There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost. —MARTHA GRAHAM
We’re mothers and mompreneurs.
In fact, our lives have sometimes become one long-running cliché: that of a busy, always-on-the-go, have-a-million-things-to-do, don’t-have-time, where-are-my-keys – type of mom. We are wearing many hats, leading busy, stressful lives and looking after everyone but ourselves. Phrases like “I’m pulp”, “I’m so freaking tired,”, “I can’t even…” pepper our everyday conversations and thoughts throughout the day (and waaay into the night!)
“I’m exhausted” has become our de facto motto, an almost universal anthem that all women with a pulse and children in tow who are constantly pulling at her legs, asking for a toy they just lost (or another snack) know the lyrics to by heart. This anthem is chanted, ironically, with more force and vitality than when we were in our early twenties singing Livin’ on a Prayer at a party at 2am.
Boy, how that song can pretty much apply to our current life right now!
Now those late nights have morphed into all-nighters of other sorts: sick children needing care, infants demanding nightly feedings, or work-related assignments with a nine am due date the next morning. And society’s bulky baggage of “shoulds” feels heavy and demoralizing: from the way we should look, the way we should feel, the way we should parent our kids, the way our relationships should look like…ad infinitum. All these shoulds steadily accumulate into our bodies, our minds and our spirits and rob us from our vitality while leaving behind a trail of anxiety and stress in its place.
Wait, was there some eye-rolling at the back there because of the word ‘mompreneur’?
Don’t let that word bother you or deprive you of the little sleep you’re most likely getting like the rest of us.
Here in The Momergy Movement, the term mompreneur applies to ALL women that have decided to define the way they work and on what terms (hint: it’s their OWN TERMS).
Be it staying at home (this is full-time work too!), or in a corporate office, or pursuing your own projects and establishing your own business, we are defining our working terms. In fact, we’re past the stage of ‘asking for permission’ and have now decided to set our own rules of the game.
And so, within our multiple roles in life, we have a unique mom energy (aka momergy) and it refers to the mental, physical and emotional energies within us as mothers.
When we take energy out of places we didn’t know existed to be able to accomplish what we need to do, we’re tapping into this momergy field.
Momergy is the natural buoyancy that defines our very nature of motherhood.
It’s the non-verbal commitment that shows up in the middle of any chaos, frustration or overwhelm to regain our natural state no matter what. Momergy is about experiencing the whole spectrum of emotions in our lives and thriving within all these emotions and NOT in spite of them.
Because there is a distinction here. And this distinction is the one that causes the biggest friction in our lives:
It is not that things are happening to us, but rather, that we are actively co-creating our own world. And so, we have the power to choose everything about it over, and over again. With zero guilt, pressure, or expectation (to do so).
Momergy is going past the hype of shoulds: how we should work, how we should feel, how we should be experiencing motherhood, how we should connect with ourselves and others…and instead, reinvent it all_ AND enjoy it all_ unapologetically.
Momergy is choosing to do something or to NOT do something with each new situation. It’s about showing up intentionally as our own self, giving more of ourselves and not less.
Momergy is our natural state of being. And it’s also about trusting this natural state to come into the foreground in any given situation in the most organic, fluid way. We don’t need to make it happen. Just let it happen. It WILL happen. Effortlessly. Naturally.
We are moms and mompreneurs.
And we’re done with the era of “finding balance” and desperately juggling all the balls in the air like circus performers.
Sometimes we’re firing on all cylinders while precariously carrying around a truckload full of plates, platters and Tupperware containers with mismatching lids.
And sometimes we order pizza, leave the dirty dishes in the sink overnight, and walk around with a greasy bun after not having washed our hair for two days (or more) because we can’t be bothered.
And we do so because we know that life is not always 50-50. Wanting to be in balance means that we constantly need to be juggling all the balls up in the air no matter what. And this balancing act is quite stressful, so screw that!
Instead, flowing with what is, means that our momergy can naturally choose and nurture which balls need our presence and attention and which ones can wait without getting guilt-tripped over it.
Momergy is what gives us the freedom to decide when, how, and where we want to keep these balls; which ones we want to carry (while placing the rest of the balls on the floor at times when our focus needs to be elsewhere without fear that they will break, or that we will irreparably damage them) and how we want to carry them around (up in the air, inside the diaper bag, in your backpocket) …. And none of this really matters as long as it feels right to us!
Momergy is that inner force that sets the stage for creativity, flow and enjoyment because we’re living in harmony with ourselves.
It is that pure potential within us that allows us to simply know and simply do without giving explanations or needing permission slips from anyone.
Momergy is bringing ourselves to life. Each and every day.
As moms and mompreneurs, we need to undergo an unlearning.
An unlearning of the formulas we learned, the beliefs we picked up or arrived at, the habits we hold on to, in order to set ourselves free.
Momergy is taking the exciting, beautiful, painful and difficult experiences and situations happening at any given moment in time AND still showing up.
It’s going through every emotion of the rainbow and going back and forth several times during the day or in the space of an hour or a minute, and creating space for it, embracing it and transcending it.
Momergy is the sadness, the anger, the hurt, the loss, AND the healing, and knowing we can do better, show up better and actually wanting to do so.
It’s knowing that we are forever stepping into an exquisite chaos of wild love and ferocious worry and there’s no other way but to go through it and enjoy it as much as we can.
Momergy is the daily choice of doing the right thing even when you’re not sure what the right thing is.
Momergy is about embracing both our crazy and special sides and taking energy out of places we didn’t know existed to be able to accomplish everything we need to do.
Momergy is about choosing authenticity and nourishing our relationship with our fellow soul sisters with honest accounts of our motherhood journey (and NOT the social media ones!).
It is about a sisterhood, where we collectively uplift, empower and support one another, whether our momergy comes from having biological children or not, because anyone can choose to tap into their own momergy source if they feel inspired to and so desire.
Our momergy is much greater than the emotions, needs and behaviors we’re struggling with.
And we deliberately harness our Momergy in a way that empowers us and uplifts us.
When we do this, we are able to free ourselves from having this overwhelming sense of fear that we’re failing at every turn, at every decision, at every “no” and every “yes” we say, at what we allow or not allow in our lives, with regards to our children, spouses or how we work or engage our time.
Let’s join our momergies collectively and let’s unite in redefining our present, co-create our future and help the next generations lead the way more consciously, more fully, and more unapologetically.
“The purpose of life is to recreate yourself anew in the next golden moment of now. In the grandest version of the greatest vision ever you held about who you are”
-NDW
And I would add: While having heaps of fun along the way.
Yours in the MOMERGY journey,
-Iva
